Tuesday, March 3, 2015

Why, Mom?

Jenny came home from school and was very quiet. She went straight to her room.

"Jenny, sweetheart," said Mom, "why so quiet?"

"I got sent to the principal's office. Here's a paper you have to sign that says I told you." answered Jenny.

"Why were you sent to the principal's office?"

"Mrs. Jenkins said climate change was the most serious threat to mankind. I asked if climate was more of a threat than the guys with swords cutting off heads. Then she asked if I was saying the president was wrong. I said he was if he was more afraid of hot weather than terrorists. Then she told me to go to the principal's office."

"What happened then?"

"The principal had me repeat the whole thing. He asked if I wanted to change what I said. I said 'No, I don't see how a smart person can be more afraid of weather than terrorists'. He glared at me, but he really didn't seem to know what to say. I think he was afraid I would tell him he had to explain how hot weather was scarier than swords. Anyway, he gave me this paper and told me to tone it down and not make Mrs. Jenkins mad."

"What are you going to do?"

"Well, I'm not going to whisper to Deidre again, that's for sure. She's not worth it. She doesn't believe but is so chicken she just goes along. What a wuss. And no, I can't actually call her that or I'll end up in the principal's office again. People here are all such cowards. They just go along with every stupid idea and don't stand up for anything. Sometimes I wish we hadn't moved here."

"What if your teacher asks about global warming?"

"I'm not going to lie. I'm not going to help stupid people--it's just impossible that hot weather is more dangerous than a sword. I couldn't answer yes to that without laughing. It's just SOOOOO stupid.
I might tell her that's the president's opinion and he's entitled to it."

Mom then asked "If she sends you to the principal again?"

Jenny answered "Then you'll have another paper to sign. I'm not lying just because these people don't understand things. Why are adults so stupid, Mom? Why?"

Saturday, February 21, 2015

Starting the new semester right

Jenny returned to school and was met by Deidre.

"Jenny, here we are again. Back to the grind."

"It's not a grind--it's school."

"Same thing."

Jenny sighed and walked along with Deidre across the playground. The bell range and they hurried to get to their first class.

"President Obama has declared climate change is the most serious threat to mankind" Mrs. Jenkins announced.

"Really?" whispered Jenny to Deidre. "Not those guys with swords cutting off heads?'

"Jenny," Mrs. Jenkins said, "do you have something to share with the class?"

"I said 'Really? Not those guys with swords cutting off heads?'"

There was a gasp from others in the class. Everyone stared at Jenny like she was an alien or maybe forgot to dress this morning.

"Excuse me?" Mrs. Jenkins asked. "What did you say?"

"I said 'Really? Not those guys with swords cutting off heads?'"

"Are you saying you think our President is wrong?"

"If he's more afraid of hotter weather than terrorists, yes."

Another gasp from the class. Deidre rolls her eyes and tries to avoid making eye contact with Jenny.

"Would you like to go to the principal's office and tell him what you said?'

"Sure, Mrs. Jenkins, if he can possibly tell me why Obama has such a rediculous idea and said it out loud, that would be helpful."

"That's it" stormed Mrs. Jenkins, "off to the principal's office".

Jenny stood sp and left the room muttering "Off with her head, off with her head. The Red Queen lives." being sure to be just soft enough not to be heard.